Attachment

In the last month of so, I have been learning a lot about attachments. Attachments to things, people, and expected outcomes of events. We all have attachments. I think its part of the human experience. In my world I see it as part of the lesson of earth school, how to practice loving detachment.

Even though this is not always a comfortable lesson, I have been fortunate to be learning this gently... Here's an example of what I mean: I ask for what I want, someone can or cannot respond the way "I want them to", I get disappointed, make excuses of why it should be the way I want it to be, they get frustrated with not being able to give me what I want, and blah blah blah so on and so forth... Now if I had already learned the lesson of loving detachment this event would have been much easier and would have looked more like this: I ask for what I want, the other person responds with "no that won't work for me", I then get to ask the question of "what will work" ~ again remembering the detachment piece ~ and we get to have conversation that makes the situation win win for both parties... Much gentler, right?! It might sound the same on paper, but the energy internally is very different. With the first interaction the heart races, the voices raise, feelings are hurt (you hurt me, blah blah blah), and no one is happy. The second way the heart may still race, but the energy remains grounded, no victim energy displayed, and everyone gets to imagine and create the event that works for them.

Maybe I think too much or over-analyze things (which has been the opinion of me in other relationships in my life), but for me its about figuring out where I am in relation to where I was, and where I am heading in relation to where I am in this given moment. Sounds simple in my head! But the internal landscape for me is always easier than the external one. I navigate well the "scapes" I know, while having to navigate other's "scapes" is always a delicate matter.

So, although I ramble on, it all comes back to attachment. Choose them, release them, move them about, and know that in the end its all an illusion anyway and at some point when its all over we will look backwards in time and get a good chuckle!!

Light and Dark

Been learning a lot about light and dark, yin and yang, and how everything is "something in relation to something else". This framework can be seen in many ways throughout our life here on this planet... AND we can't have one without the other.

So I post this photo to remind myself (and my blogging buds) about this concept. Light and Dark... No one is all light or all dark. We are a glorious combination of both, and we can choose either or in any situation. That's the gift of free will and life experience...

Until next time ~ Janet

A little chaos please..

Hello my bloggers... Been quite awhile since last I wrote... Life has been, shall we say, interesting... Growing pains all around in my little world. My partners 11 year old son has started middle school (aarghhh), my partner graduated massage school and got his license, and I have been completing my reflexology certification and trainings in abdominal meridian massage. Along with these events that felt so big (some exciting, some not so) I was still working and sharing the gift of massage and alternative healing work with clients, family and friends....

With all these changes life had become stressful. Spending way too much time doing things that needed to be done, and not enough time just being. My experience was that all the "doings" were creating disconnects for each of us. And when we are not connected in a spiritual energetic way the chaos of life can feel to me like holding onto a "live" wire and not being able to let go. Can you imagine how that would look??? Like one of those cartoons where someone picks up the fire hose and it wildly thrashes about and bangs into things until the water is turned off...

Well that's exactly how I had been feeling. BUT, I am one of the fortunate ones... I have many tools in my bag that I can use to "come back home" internally. To feel grounded in the midst of chaos. And all I keep hearing is "as the world changes, and energy shifts, most people will be going through some kind of chaos." So this little "bump in the road" was a gift ~ A way to experience the shifting and chaos personally so that I am able to support those around me in a loving way when they experience it... So bring it on Universe, but please remember I like my lessons with chocolate!

Missy Maloney, my first lost love

Today I had a very interesting experience with memory...
This morning Jim got the tractor stuck at the edge of the pond. Someone needed to sit on the tractor while the jeep pulled it out and since I was not comfortable pulling it out, I took the job of sitting on the tractor. As I was sitting on it as I took my foot off the brake to allow it to be pulled backwards it slipped a little forward first. Of course Jim had it all under control and seconds later the tractor was pulled away from the edge of the pond and I was safely off of it. But in that split second where it was slipping a memory slipped in, not just into my mind, but into my body.

The memory was of my best friend, my first love, who died at age 16. Her car went off a bridge and she drowned. Here's the part that was interesting. I had moved away a year before that and we had drifted apart ~ ya' know how it goes. You call alot at first then there are a few visits but then it stops. It stopped because our last visit I was very angry. I was angry because she had moved on with her life and was happy and I had been moved and was not happy. 6 months later she was gone. I didn't go to her funeral. I didn't even cry. I stuffed it...

Today all the emotions that were stuffed came back. It hit me blindsided. I didn't realize I had been holding so much anger and guilt. Anger that she left me (died) and I never got to say sorry. Guilt because I was angry at her for leaving. Lots of feelings that I was not even aware that I was holding.

So, the question I have is this... How many things happen to us on our journey here on this earth that we stuff that later comes out (when the just the right button is pushed) in yucky spewingness (I know, I know, not a word ~ but you know exactly what I am saying). And then the next question is how do we remember this lesson so that when someone else is feeling something that is painful so that we can hold the space of lovingkindness. That's the test. Holding the space of lovingkindness through the "stuff" that is being released, even when we are not aware that we are releasing stuff...

To end this post I say Thank You to my friend Missy Maloney who taught me about love and friendship and death and pain. She will never be forgotten in my heart.

Shamonic Journey with Elizabeth

She appears as the drum beat begins
the body's syncopation
Eager heart question not
As the eagle sits
on her unharmed arm

Take flight, receive, imagine, believe
Guidance whispered kindly "Stand Firm"
Whipping wind washing
memories of want
as the talons sink deep
into un-pained flesh

Stand firm
Stand firm
Stand firm

Sweet is the fruit that is planted in love, watered with kindness, warmed by a smiling sun and picked by a grateful hand. Endless shades and possibilities exist for each blossom to grow into. Treat yourself and your life as if it is the most bountiful tree in the orchard.

This to me is a most beautiful sentiment, and I believe it to be 100% true.

If we all could think of ourselves as the most beautiful tree in the orchard we wouldn't fall into the trap of comparison and labels. Comparison to others is a sure way to reduce yourself to the lowest common denominator, and then you create a label (I am...) to really reduce yourself.
I know it can be difficult to remember how special we each are, especially when commercials and advertising are letting us know how good we could be if we only purchased (x,y,z)... Do we really need things or do we want things. Can we survive on less? Will we be viewed as "less" if we HAVE less? I say the less I have the less I need. If I only have to pay $1500 a month to live (mortgage, food, car, etc.) then I only have to work for 40 hours a week... That gives me LOTS of play time, and when I play I create the vibration of joy, and when I am joyful I see myself as the most beautiful tree in the orchard, and when I create that vibration, I call to myself more resources to do what I want to do!

So my question to you today is: How can you live on less so that you can have (internally, in your relationships, in your community, etc.) more?

The acorn that we all are

This weekend I was in the presence of like minded loving individuals, playing and learning and experiencing Chi!!
While experiencing the question was raised about an acorn and what do you see when you look at the acorn... I see a seed, and potential, and the beginnings of beautiful strong oak tree! Then we were asked to see all those we come in contact with as the acorn and I thought to myself, what a concept, if all of us could do this more than not.

I do it in my practice of bodywork and energy therapy, but once in a great while I get stuck in seeing someone for where they have been and what they have done (to me sometimes, and sometimes to others) and I sit in judgement. So, my pledge to myself is this... to become more aware of when the non-acorn thinking is happening and to pause, take a moment to redirect my thoughts, and to see them as the beautiful strong oak that they are ~ no matter where they are on their path...

Thanks to all those who spent the time talking, working, and pondering about the possibilities of life! Be well!