Sunshine and moonbeams and rose colored glasses

5 days out from surgery and I am having dreams of getting up off the couch and walking across the room, opening the door and running in the field under the stars... Then I wake up and feel my heart racing as if I have been running... Now the sun is beckoning me to come play outside and in my minds eye I feel the breeze, smell the trees, and hear the birds in the pond a mile away...

Funny thing the mind... In Chinese medicine the mind rests in the blood. First time I heard that it was an aahaaa moment. So if the mind rests in the blood and the heart circulates the blood and all of our body's nutrients supply the organs through the blood than our hearts and minds are surely one... Of course this thought then brought another thought... And if you haven't guessed it already it was about love...

Love. The one pure energy. Have had conversations about this with many folks lately. Sometimes I think human beings get confused about love. I read a great quote that said romantic love and divine love are one in the same energy. Romantic love sparks the heart so that divine love can rise up... Then I think of all the loves in my life. And I think of those who have shared their perspective on love, with good intention "advising" that i take a look at my thoughts on love because they have the impression that I need to learn the difference (in their mind) of true love and romantic fantasy love...

So here's my thoughts: love, romantic or otherwise is a feeling. We feel it... In our bodies, with our bodies, and into our souls. I do not regret ever loving. I love 100%, heart mind and body. I know not how to separate them. Does love last forever? Maybe... But even if it is fleeting it IS ALWAY WORTH IT. Yes it means sometimes on a human level I may be disappointed or hurt, but the thought of living a life without feeling the deep intimate connection of another seems empty and sad to me.

So as my friend Linda says ya gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince, and I might add, they all are princes... And we all are princesses (or queens, lol). We experience, we give, we receive, we enjoy, we grow, we challenge each other... Sometimes they move on, and sometimes, I believe, it's possible they stay around for the long haul...

Thoughts on abundance

Illness or accidents often give us the opportunity to slow down and take stock in our life. This has been the case for me... It has also given me the opportunity to watch the law of attraction work pretty much immediately... A few examples; a few days ago I was wishing I had sausage gravy and bisquits from Caspers diner, our local diner that I go to pretty regularly on friday mornings... I was imagining the taste and smell, thinking about the great conversations that happen at the diner, and how Barb only makes sausage gravy on friday mornings.. No joke, withon 5minutes Barb showed up at my door with sausage gravy and a get well card.
Another example; I was wondering how I was going to pay my rent without having an income. Logical wondering for someone who is self employed... Within 24 hours my friend offered me rent in exchange for gift certificates for when I was well, then another friend said she was going to organize a garage sale and all proceeds would go toward paying my rent...
Such validation that what we think we create. I let go, put out what I needed without attachment to how it was going to come and I was plesantly surprised!
Why is it that we worry? This experience is reminding me, totally reinforcing within my cellular structure that worry is wasteful and useless... We are taught that it is good to worry, but I for one will do less and less and less of it so that I can manifest more and more and more of what I truly desire!
Manifest away dear ones! It is totally worth your awareness of words thoughts and deeds!!!

Silence

Since I last wrote I have had many changes (does that surprise anyone???)... The biggest one was that on Sunday I broke all the bones in my ankle and dislocated it too... Now I am needing pins and plates to stabilize the ankle so that I can walk sometime in the future. Although painful (and let me tell you, it is crazy painful) I am asking for the blessings to be shown to me. There are many but the most apparent one is that I am having to sit in silence. I don't have a television to distract me and I am not really able to concentrate on reading at this time, so I am praying and listening. Wow what you hear when there is no "sound" to distract you. The birds sing to me every day, and I feel as if I can understand their songs. The trees whisper and I sometimes feel as if I am dancing with them in spirit. My breath has become a very large part of my conscious awareness. My breath and my thoughts. And then of course its the thought of "the great whatever"... Whatever.... This is what my reality is right now, this is where I need to be or I wouldn't be here. This is it. What I created for myself to experience silence. To connect to my new surroundings. To be one with "whatever"... And every once in a while I get that little thread of a thought of fear about the upcoming surgery, and I remind myself that "whatever" will be will be. I will heal. Life will continue or not, and it all just doesn't matter. Its good. Its really good. And I am grateful.

One of my Guides has said "its a time of great purification" so I allow for that energy to move me, inside and out. To allow me to really connect to those in my life. To be humbled by the stepping up of family, friends, and community and by the KNOWING that this is just a bump in the road. A time of silence. Just a time of ...

Healing ~ a journey worth taking

As part of my own healing and journey inward I have been getting up each day around 4am and watching the world come to life. The birds, WOW! The geese on the pond, one lonely honk, then many as if one is the alarm clock...
The sun peeking over the horizon and the trees in sillhoette stretching their arms and doing QiKung with me. The mosquitos need to remember their place. That's what I keep reminding them. No biting till after QiKung and only if it is absolutly necessary for survival~ please find another hostess. The dogs at my feet hearing new morning sounds too. So much to be grateful for and all of you too! So much gratitude fills me, and soon the black goddess will be ready for my consumption. So as a word, or sentence, or photo, or conversation tries to pull me back into what I have lost, I remind myself of what I have gained. Keeping track of the minds "tricks" of wanting to be suffer, wanting to be the victim, wanting to jump up and down and say what about me... I remind myself again, the mind rests in the blood... The mind is necessary too... But for this moment it will take a back seat until the heart has mended and is strong enough to hold the amazing energy of the intellect!

And so, the day has begun, and I am in Joy! Hoping the same for all of you! Much love!